Hosting family for Christmas is a beautiful way to celebrate togetherness—until the turkey burns, your aunt starts a debate about politics, and your kitchen starts looking like the finale of a chaotic holiday baking competition.
Don’t worry, though—hosting doesn’t have to leave you frazzled. Here are 5 practical tips for managing holiday stress and keeping your sanity intact, backed by data because, yes, science cares about your holiday well-being.
Lists Are Your Best Friend - (You know here at MDW we love list making!)
Santa is making his list and checking it twice- so should you. Create a master to-do list and break it into manageable tasks. Schedule shopping, cooking, and decorating in small chunks. This reduces the pressure to get everything done in one marathon session.
Why it works: According to a study by Psychological Science, people who break tasks into smaller, planned steps report lower stress levels because planning reduces uncertainty and increases perceived control.
Delegate Like a Boss
Repeat after me: You don’t have to do it all. Assign tasks to family members—let someone else tackle the mashed potatoes or string the lights. Yes, Uncle Bob’s gravy might have lumps or Aunt Martha’s “famous” marshmallow salad may look more and more questionable every year, but it’s one less thing for you to worry about.
Stat to back it up: A 2020 survey by the American Psychological Association (APA) found that 61% of people feel less stressed when they share responsibilities during the holidays.
Manage Expectations (Yours and Theirs)
Your house doesn’t have to look like a Hallmark movie set, and your meal doesn’t have to rival Martha Stewart’s. Communicate realistic expectations with your family.
Focus on making memories, not perfection.
A reality check: According to a report by the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), 64% of people feel the holidays add unrealistic pressure to meet societal expectations, which significantly contributes to holiday-related stress.
Schedule Downtime
Hosting family can feel like managing a weeklong holiday marathon. Build breaks into your schedule—whether it’s a 20-minute nap, a walk outside, or quietly sipping your favorite tea in a room without loud chatter. Protect your energy so you can be present during the festivities.
Research says: A 2021 study in Frontiers in Psychology found that intentional breaks and mindfulness practices reduce cortisol levels and improve mood during high-stress periods.
Laugh it Off- (I know, I know… sometimes the perfectionism tendencies make this hard to do)
When things go sideways (and they will), choose humor over panic. Your dog might track mud all over the house right after you’ve spent hours cleaning, but you’ll be laughing about it next year when the same thing happens. Studies show that laughter reduces stress and strengthens family bonds, turning mishaps into cherished memories.
Bonus stat: Harvard Medical School reports that laughter reduces stress hormones like cortisol and increases endorphins, making you feel better even if the tree lights won’t untangle.
Three Key Stats to Remember:
69% of people find the holidays stressful due to financial, time, and family pressures (APA, 2021).
Sharing responsibilities reduces holiday stress for 61% of people (APA, 2020).
Incorporating mindfulness and intentional breaks can lower cortisol levels by up to 32% (Frontiers in Psychology, 2021).
Wrapping It Up
Hosting family for Christmas can be joyous, but it doesn’t have to feel like a high-stakes performance. By planning, delegating, and laughing through the chaos, you can create a holiday experience everyone will enjoy—including you. After all, the best memories come from connection, not perfection.
So, go ahead and embrace the chaos, enjoy the moments, and remember:
The holidays are about connection, not perfection. You’ve got this!
About the author:
Carrie Summers is the mental health advisor for MDW and a licensed clinical social worker at her practice Noreila Healing & Wellness in Wheaton, Illinois.
Specializing in perinatal, relationship issues, divorce, life transitions, and narcissistic abuse recovery, Carrie offers a warm and direct approach to therapy and counseling. With expertise in perinatal mental health and fertility struggles, she provides a safe and non-judgmental space for clients to explore their emotional well-being.
Carrie is available in-person and online for therapy. Learn more here.